I can’t remember much of what high school was like. 5 years on, and I have little memory of what really went on back then. Save for a close circle of friends, I was virtually invisible, having nothing credible to my name. I don’t think it bothered me much, I was happy enough with a few regrets here and there. I could’ve done more, I could’ve been more, but I didn’t, I wasn’t, and that will be that.
Ever since I was roped into joining Facebook, I’ve had to deal with the occasional request from an old school mate. The social hierarchy that was so firmly in place back in high school is no longer existent, and now everybody’s eager to mix and mingle, whatever your status was back then.
It’s odd. I’m not saying I have a problem with it, but it’s odd all the same. Where there was once barriers, you now find people eagerly reaching out to every person listed under the same school batch despite probably not even knowing the person. It’s the time of reconnecting and renewing old ties.
I’ve had a few people send requests, and I find even after checking their profiles that I have absolutely no idea who they are. It’s mortifying to have such bad memory, especially when you discover you have 45 mutual friends between you and them, went to the same school and graduated in the same year. Whatever happened to my being virtually invisible? And how can I not remember the people from only 5 years back?
I’ve had to deal with the awkward decision of whether to accept requests such as these or not. I don’t want to be some stuck-up prick who’s too good to say yes (which, post-high school, would be ironic) but I’d prefer to have friends whom I’ve actually spoken to, at least once, in person or online. It isn’t that I’m not open to reconnecting, but I think it’s quite presumptuous to send a request without so much as a small message when we’ve never acknowledged each other’s existence before. How can you renew something that was never there in the first place?
I end up racking my brain endlessly, trying to recall something about the person I might’ve missed, forgotten or erased but I come up empty and then sheepishly confirm the request with one hesitant click, all out of guilt.
I think it’s time to put my foot down on this and learn to say No. It’s starting to feel like high school all over again.
Enough said here.
