Its another entry from the bowels of the good old IIUM library. Why I say bowels, you ask? Well the thing is, the law section has been suggestively placed underground, leaving me with this tangible feeling that its implying law students are human moles who shrivel away from sunlight. But then again, I’d say that’s almost about right, seeing that the first requirement to be a law student is to have a passionate, and I stress again, passionate love for reading. No kidding. It’s a miracle we’re all not cross-eyed. I guess that’s a talent we have.
It’s a sunny Monday, the day looks promising, yet all I want to do is to stay under covers and write. I can’t understand it, but I’m feeling particularly off today. It isn’t very pleasing for me to drag my feet to class, it isn’t professional, yet its all I can do to not look like I’m trying so hard to lift my legs, step after step, one by one.
Why does it seem I’m suddenly tired of people? Last Friday, I had a major flip-out in front of Yani, Kak Shara and Kak Laila. Not very attractive, but I couldn’t help it. People have suddenly gotten so typical! I can’t explain it, but it seems like I can’t meet anyone who will surprise me anymore. Nothing will surprise me anymore, everyone’s the same. And you know what? The most typical person of them all is me. I’m just so easy to read, my personality is so common with so many others, and everyone wonders why they try and stand out and yet fail. It’s because everyone’s the same. Take music, for example. I know and see many who try so hard to have a liking for music that isn’t mainstream, to be unique, individualistic. You have these certain classes of people; the sweetheart, the popular, the bitchy, the shy, the withdrawn, the loud, the I-don’t-give-a-damn-screw-the-world, etc etc and what’s scary is that these are all people who we want others to see and not who we really are. And when people try and communicate with the real you, up comes the defence mechanism and we tend to lash out to ‘protect our fragile selves’. What’s worse is when we’re being ourselves and its something good, because most people wouldn’t take you for real, and wonder why you’re supposedly so obviously putting up an act. You know what I mean?
The best weapon you can have in situations when people can’t accept your true personality is probably Indifference.
Enough said here.
